CombatCritic's TravelValue™: pizza

Showing posts with label pizza. Show all posts

Thursday, October 16, 2025

Washougal, WA: We Walked Into A Trap, But Won't Be Coming Through That Door Anytime Soon

Trap Door Brewery

1834 Main Street

Washougal, WA 98671

(360) 314-6966

trapdoorbrewing.com/home

Prices: $$$$

$17 for a 5-inch Italian sub and $9 for a pint? Give me a break!

The food was meh, the servers couldn’t crack a smile if their lives depended on it, and the prices are flat-out insulting. I just spent 4+ years in Europe where inflation was the same (thanks Joe), yet restaurant prices didn’t skyrocket like they have here. The only explanation: good old-fashioned American greed.

The fondue was decent and the best value on the menu.

That “Italian sub” barely stretched six inches and had a whisper of meat and cheese. At best, it was worth $10 … maybe. Charging $17 is highway robbery with a pickle on the side.

Washougal doesn’t need another overpriced brewpub—there are already too many of those, along with sushi joints and Chinese takeout. A mom & pop Italian restaurant with red and white checker tablecloths and candles melting down Chianti bottles would be a welcome sight this side of Olive Garden. This was our first visit and it will be our last.

CombatCritic gives Trap Door Brewery 4 Bombs Out Of 10 … More Bombs Are Better … Unless You’re On The Receiving End!

Four Bombs Equates To:

Translation for Civilians: "Bend Over, Here It Comes Again"

Vancouver, WA: No Veal, No Deal - Olive Garden Delivers Mediocrity with a Side of Sticker Shock

We came for the all-you-can-eat soup, salad, and breadsticks -- the Holy Trinity of corporate Italian cuisine -- and yeah, they come free with a lunch special. The catch? Lunch specials are only Monday through Friday until 3pm. We showed up on a Saturday. Oops. Missed it by that much.

My wife ordered the Fettuccine Alfredo -- $12.49 on the lunch menu, $17.49 for dinner. I went with the Chicken Parmigiana, which jumped from a manageable $13.49 at lunch to an eyebrow-raising $21.49. So when the bill came out to damn near $55, I nearly spit out my overpriced Diet Coke.

To his credit, the server offered to grab the manager and maybe knock the prices back down to lunch levels. But I declined. I missed the fine print. My bad. That's called integrity, folks -- look it up.

The salad? Fresh, sure. But whoever's in the back manning the vinegar bottle went full Molotov cocktail. I like tang, but this was a salt-and-acid bomb. The Zuppa Toscana was watery, with a sausage-to-potato ratio so low it might've qualified as vegetarian. Not awful, just ... meh. Breadsticks? Still the MVP -- soft, salty, and piping hot.

The wife liked her Alfredo. My chicken parm and limp spaghetti? It was food. That's about as glowing as I can get. But hey, it's Olive Garden -- it's not like we walked in expecting Nonna to come out of the kitchen.

And for the love of God and every Italian who's ever lived, how in the hell are there so few decent Italian restaurants in Portland? And don't even get me started on the complete disappearance of veal. No veal marsala, veal parmigiana, or saltimbocca alla romana? What in the Fettuccine Alfredo is going on here folks? Somebody kill me a baby cow already -- I need my veal fix, dammit!

CombatCritic Gives Olive Garden 5 Bombs Out Of 10 ... More Bombs Are Better ... Unless You're On The Receiving End ... HOOAH!

Five Bombs Equates To:

Translation for Civilians: "Continue Mission"

Sunday, July 2, 2023

Seville, Spain: Very Good Pizza, But A Bit Pricey ... Nearly A TravelValue!

Il Ristorantino Dell' Avvocato

Calle Regina 6 Las Setas De Sevilla

41003 Sevilla, Spain

IlRistorantinoDellAvvocato

Prices: €€€€

Vera pizza Napolitana (real neapolitan pizza)? Piu o meno, si, buonissimo!

I do not offer praise easily, but this place was almost the BOMB! The service was excellent and the starter, pizza, and tiramisu delicious, but prices were high and servings a bit small.

The Chianti Classico was decent and the price (€14), cheapest on the menu, was fair. A small bottle of San Pellegrino (frizzante - €3) was about the same price as I would expect from a liter bottle.

The arancini and other mixed, fried starters (€7) were different than I have ever had in Napoli, but, top-notch, even though we only got one of each, six in all.

Salcsiccia é Friariielli pizza (€14)

My Salcsiccia é Friariielli pizza (€14 - €6 more than in Napoli) was as good as any I have had in Naples, but the outer crust was a bit too thick, limiting the amount of ingredients on the pizza itself (mozzarella, sausage, and friarielli (broccoli rabe sauteed in olive oil and garlic). Not the best value ... BUMMER!

Esagerata pizza (€22)

My wife's 'special' Esagerata pizza (€22) with mozzarella, peppers, sliced potatoes, onion and sausage came covered with an infusion of smoke that was quite an extravaganza. She is Sicilian, raised in Napoli, so she knows good pizza and was extremely pleased with her selection. However, we were not told the price and €22 for an individual pizza is quite extreme, so they lose a bomb there, and, I am being generous. Was it €8 better than my pizza? No, it was not.

The Tiramisu (€6) came deconstructed in a cup as our server poured a bicchieri of espresso napolitana on top ... YUMMY! The only downside, beside the price, was that the serving was a bit smaller than we had hoped, so my wife and I had to battle over the last bite, she won (happy wife, happy life!)

Tiramisu (€6)

We were offered limoncello after the meal, but it was not clear if it was offered, free of charge, like many Italian restaurants. They brought us a digestivo, amaro, in the end, so it was a decent conclusion to our meal, but I would have preferred the limoncello.

We would have paid far less than €40 for a similar meal in Napoli,, so the €66 price tag was a bit extreme, but we enjoyed the meal nonetheless, after all, we were in Seville, not Naples.

CombatCritic Gives Il Ristorantino dell' Avvocato 8 Bombs Out Of 10 With Little Room For Improvement ... More Bombs Are Better!

Eight Bombs Equates To:

Translation for Civilians: "What-The-Fuck ... Over!"

Thursday, June 15, 2023

Another Review of the Day (ROTD) ... HOOAH!

Friday, March 31, 2023

Tournai, Belgium: Mama Mia, Vecchia Napoli Is 'THE BOMB' ... HOOAH!

Vecchia Napoli

* Italian, Pizza *

Rue de l'Yser, 7500

Tournai, Belgium

Facebook - VecchiaNapoliRistorante

Phone: +32 466 28 81 35

Prices: €€€€

It was a windy, chilly day in Tournai, a beautiful city, just across the French border in Belgium, on the river Scheldt.

My wife, a Sicilian who grew up in Napoli, spotted this place as we were roaming around Tournai looking for a place to have lunch that would allow my service dog, Kemper, to join us. They were happy to have us and treated Kemper like a king, giving him cookies and petting him as they walked by.

Modern inside and tastefully, yet simply decorated, there is a huge wood fired oven just inside the door where delicious, authentic pizza napolitana is made. The staff are very kind and efficient, making our meal all the better. As soon as we sat down, we were greeted and given a small complimentary triangle of warm ciabatta topped with chopped tomato tossed in EVO and herbs.

We started with some house red wine (€8/50 cl) and an Affettati Mixte (€15), a huge, generous wood platter filled with a tasty variety of Italian salamis and hams. Along with the fresh bread, it was a delightful start to our meal.

My wife dislikes tomatoes, so she ordered the Pizza 4 Formaggi (€14), topped with a little cream and an abundance of mozzarella, gorgonzola, emmental, parmigiano, then topped with a little EVO. She does not hand out praise easily, especially when it comes to pizza, but she gave it two thumbs up ... Mamma Mia!

I went with my favorite, Pizza Diavola (€13.50), coming with tomato sauce, mozzarella, slices of salami, and olio piccante (EVO infused with red chili peppers). Like my wife's, the pizza dough was thrown and perfectly baked in the neapolitan way, the only difference from pizza in Naples being that the cheese and toppings are more abundant here. It was delicioso ... OOH-RAH!

Santo, the owner, hails from Pompeii - a relative suburb of Naples - and was extremely nice, making us feel very welcome while he manned the pizza oven and delivered food.

Our feast was a relative bargain at €53.50, considering prices in all of the other restaurants we saw in Tournai were quite high with lunch entrees mostly starting at at around €17.00 ... WTFO!

CombatCritic Gives Vecchia Napoli A Stellar 10 Bombs Out Of 10 And A Spot On My 'WALL OF FAME' ... HOOAH! 🇺🇸

Ten Bombs Equates To:

Translation for Civilians:

HOOAH!: "Phonetic spelling of the acronym HUA, which stands for 'Heard Understood Acknowledged.' Originally used by the British in the late 1800's in Afghanistan. More recently adopted by the United States Army to indicate an affirmative or a pleased response." - Urban Dictionary

"The Department of Military Science and Leadership, University of Tennessee claim HOOAH 'refers to or means anything except no' ... Regardless of its meaning ... the term is an expression of high morale, confidence, motivation and spirit." - WarChronicle.com

"The U.S. Air Force stole 'HOOAH' from the Army because we were part of the Army until 1947 and rather than waste a bunch of time coming up with something new and unique like "ROO-YAH" or "HAL-A-LOO-YAH", we said 'screw it, let's go with HOOAH' ... thanks Army ... HOOAH!" - CombatCritic
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Title: Tournai, Belgium: Mama Mia, Vecchia Napoli Is 'THE BOMB' ... HOOAH!

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Vancouver, WA: Operation Schnitzel: Gustav’s Remains a Trusted Rally Point