Bizzarro
18-22 Craven Road
London W2 3PX
United Kingdom
Paddington Station
Phone number +44 20 7723 6029
Website: bizzarro.co.uk
Prices: ££££
Everything is à la carte here, like in Italy, but the food is not ... like in Italy. Meat dishes come with nothing and bread is €1/person. A 10% service charge (£4.19 - $5.80) was also automatically included, so our server seemed extremely arrogant and nonchalant, a bit of an ass. Why should he care if the service charge (tip) is mandatory? He did not get a pence more.
A half liter of house red wine is £9.40 ($13) on their website menu, but it was £10.20 ($14.15) when the bill arrived. The half liter carafe was far from full and it was not good. I had the Pasta e Fagioli (£4.50) and it was too soupy, had the wrong beans, and bland. Two teaspoons of grated parmesan did not even help. My wife the Olives (£2.90), a decent portion, but a tad spicy-hot because of the sliced jalapeños in the olive oil. Strange.
She had the Fettuccine Prosciutto e Funghi (£8.90 - $12.32 for a "main" - £1 more than the small) and I the Vitello Saltimbocca alla Romana (veal topped with prosciutto and sage in a wine sauce - £10.90 - $15.09). Her portion of fettuccine was not very big, so I would hate to see the small version (£7.90), and it was bland with little flavor. My veal was actually beef (you can tell by the color - greyish, not white - and the way it cuts) and had a strange flavor. I am not sure if it was the wine they used, the sage, or both, but it tasted a little of a chemical of some kind.
It was a disappointing experience after having read the great reviews, but then some throw 5-Stars around like candy. I guess I am a bit more demanding than most, having lived and traveled extensively in Italy for many years, but this meal was not even close to the 4-Stars (7-8 Bombs) they average on yelp. It was one of the worst £46 ($64) meals I have eaten. Bizzarro!
CombatCritic Gives Bizzarro 3 Bombs Out Of 10 ... More Bombs Are Better!
Three Bombs Equates To:
Translation for Civilians: "Situation Normal, All Fucked Up"
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Title: London, England: Bizzarro Does Not Even Start To Describe This Place
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